Fear
David Berman • July 24, 2023
white half dome shape

Does Fear Propel or Paralyze you? 

 

What is fear?  I define fear as that unexpected moment in life where you don’t have time to be anxious or worry.  A sudden rapid linear acceleration that takes you with it and seemingly will not let go of you.  And it’s headed into either the unknown or a place you don’t want to go voluntarily. 

 

You have two choices.  You can choose to ride along with it and react, or you can choose to “STOP” and create a mental time and space to think and contemplate and plan and react purposefully.   To be proactive or reactive.   

 

Even taking a 2 to 5 second “pause” and thinking about what is happening, defining your potential downside risks.   This is you creating space, putting a brake on the rapid rate of events unfolding.  Giving yourself a chance to act, even if your action(s) do not stop the event – it has the potential to – it also now creates a feedback loop where you are putting the brakes on the acceleration, of having  space and purpose to act and be proactive.  You are bringing to bear your greatest asset – your ability to think and plan.  You are now being proactive.  You are now experiencing the all or none feature of your brain – it is now focusing on finding a fix and now fear has no place or space in your brain to live.   

 

Ex.  If you all of a sudden notice a stranger following you.  Down into the subway, into the car, and then out of the car, and then out to the street when you get off at your subway stop.  What do you do?  If you let fear paralyze you, you end up cornering yourself in a small space completely paralyzed by fear and at their mercy.  You have let fear paralyze you.   

 

Or you can put yourself into a quick mental time out.  Take a deep breath and mentally relax.  You may need to try more than once to do it, but once you do it, magic happens. 

 

When you get to the street surface you can look for a cop.  If none are there, you can look for ways to go in multiple directions and see if that person still follows you.  And if they still follow you, you can get on your phone and dial 911.  And if they still are following you, you can yell “FIRE” (yelling "help" never works, it is ignored too often and every human being is afraid of being burned by fire – they will stop and look).  You can think about how to stay away from getting yourself locked into a tight quarter without escape.  You can take your keys out of your purse and (God forbid) get ready to defend yourself.   

 

You have now taken fear and let it propel you instead of being paralyzed by it.  And this is true in so many situations.  Remember if you do nothing that is still your choice and action.   

 

Fear - embrace it, let it propel you and not paralyze you.  By doing that, you have a far greater chance of success and happiness. 

 

Wishes for a great day to all, 

Hugs too, 

David/ 



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